
Abraham Lincoln
Liam Mathews, Editor-in-chief
Well I’m really not looking forward to this fight. Not only was Lincoln 6’ 4” and a talented wrestler who only lost one match out of 300, but he’s also an American legend who I don’t want to fight even in the slightest. However, I’ll do my duty and try to beat up one of the four men on mount Rushmore, and I’ll shake his hand and tell Lincoln how much I respect him after he’s beating my
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