Not-your-typical Valentine’s Day movie list

In need of love? Mola Rams got just the thing for you!

In need of love? Mola Ram’s got just the thing for you!

Galen Alaks, Layout Editor

After a long day of rose-picking, chocolate-eating, and lip-puckering, there’s nothing better than to watch a movie while snuggled up with your girlfriend or boyfriend or box of half-stale chocolates you got on sale at Penny’s like I’ll be doing. Here are the five best movies of all time to watch on Valentine’s Day.

Godzilla (1998)

Godzilla and itself spend some quality time together.

While far inferior to the Toho movies and the 2014 Godzilla movie, Godzilla 1998 is one of the best choices around for a Valentine’s Day movie. When a boss “nicely” asks one of his assistants to go on a date, she turns him down to go out with some worm. The boss is heartbroken, especially seeing as there are no more fish in the sea, because they’ve all been taken out to feed a certain giant lizard. With a tender relationship between Godzilla and… itself… Godzilla 1998 is a must-see movie for those who love romantic movies and baby velociraptors.

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984)

Mola Ram wants all the love he can get his hands on- literally!

No, it’s not Indiana Jones and Willie: the true relationship in this movie is between Mola Ram and his goddess, Kali. Although he makes her necklaces out of dead animals and imagines what it would be like if they ever had kids, Mola Ram still feels unloved, so he starts to steal the hearts of other people before sending them down into the lava. Cardiectomies and chaos lead Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom into the list of the best Valentines Day movies.

Thor (2011)

Thor and Jane Foster before Thor dumped Jane for some poptarts.

From Thor and Jane Foster to Odin and naps, this movie is just brimming with romance. Jane Foster discovers her mistake of introducing Thor to pop tarts, which soon leads to her being shunned for the breakfast food. Thor and Loki share some brotherly love, which soon leads to both Thor and Heimdall getting the cold shoulder, with Heimdall’s shoulder quite a bit colder than Thor’s. Thor hammers love into the superhero franchise in a spectacular fashion.

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (1991)

Kirk on his first date with Kirk.

Fourth is one of the best sci-fi movies made to date, Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country. At first glance, you may think (as you haven’t for any other of these movies) that this movie doesn’t really belong on the list because there are too many Klingons and too much zero-G blood (which does relate to hearts, mind you). But may I point you towards the time when Kirk kisses a hot babe, a monster, and himself all at the same time? Enough has been said. Don’t pass this movie by this Valentine’s Day!

The Mummy (1999)

Nick O'Connell tells Imhotep he's in love with Evelyn, too.

If a love lasting for 3000 years doesn’t spell Valentine’s Day movie, I don’t know what does. Imhotep fights for his love of Anck-su-Namun, of whom he broke up with after an embalming. Imhotep picks out a new dudette, Evelyn Carnahan, to use as a sacrifice to bring her back, but an adventurer, Rick O’Connell, is in love with Evelyn, leading to a Betty/Veronica/Archie love triangle with ten more plagues than normal, if Reggie doesn’t count as one. A tale of heartthrob and other throbbing parts after those flesh-eating scarabs come in, The Mummy is a movie that must not be missed this Valentine’s Day!